Sit Still

I'm getting antsy. My mind has started to wander to thoughts of moving. I've lived in this area for over 7 years- the longest I've lived in one place my entire adult life. When I look back, I can see that sometimes my desire to move to a new place results from the fact that I'm not comfortable with inactivity in my life. There were moves I made to follow a new opportunity, or to have a new adventure. But there were also moves that were strictly running away.

I suspect that my restless feelings and my desire for new surroundings is not 100% genuine. I think it comes from the odd emotional state I'm in. I'm not good at "sitting with my feelings". I'm good at pushing them aside, I'm good at letting it roll off my back, and I'm really good at denial. But not good at simply dealing with it.

This time I'm going to be still. I'm going to be sad. I'm going to acknowledge the void I feel- and not rush to fill it. I will journal about the details of what I am experiencing. I will spend some more time outdoors. I will exercise. I will stay connected to friends. This isn't the time for me to do the tough work. This is my recovery time.