When real life passion turns to fantasy

I am a passionate person. When I love- I love deeply. When I desire, it's almost completely out of control. Love, passion, desire, caring...feelings that consume me.

Unfortunately, I'm not always in love. Like right now. I've cleansed my heart of a recent love. A painful process. Sort of like spring cleaning after a long winter of cluttering up your garage and basement. But the feeling you get when you're finished? Pure joy.

Currently, I'm "in like". Which is great and fun and wonderful, but doesn't use up all of my feelings of love and desire. I have plenty left over.

At times like this, I have a tendency to develop crushes. Fantasies. I am drawn to strangers, which is not like me at all. The other night I went out late with a girlfriend of mine, and I saw this truly beautiful young man on the metro. I have no idea how old he was, perhaps mid to late twenties. And I enjoyed looking at him.

At times like this, I am more easily drawn to celebrities. Reminds me of my schoolgirl crushes- and the posters I used to have on my bedroom wall. My usual celebrity crushes are the confirmed bachelors that are around my age or older...George, Matthew, Vince. The more opposed they seem to marriage in real life, the more they seem to appeal to me in fantasy. Recently though, I'm inexplicably drawn to younger men. I have noticed in recent years that I'm at this interesting time in dating years...where men much older and men much younger approach me. And I enjoy that.

Spring is definitely in the air, isn't it? :)